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The Unfriendly Skies

FILE - In this Sept. 8, 2015, file photo, a United Airlines passenger plane lands at Newark Liberty International Airport in Newark, N.J. Twitter users are poking fun at United's tactics in having a man removed from an overbooked Chicago to Louisville flight on April 9, 2017. (AP Photo/Mel Evans, File)

Somehow you would think that an airline that has already earned the ire and resentment of global travelers of all stripes for its less than courteous debarkation of a ticketed and seated passenger on an overbooked flight (we’re talking bash and drag, here) and, just a week later, throwing a couple on their way to get married off a flight to Costa Rica with plenty of empty seats (the two simply sat in an empty aisle because a man was asleep in their seat and they could not wake him), would have public relations and customer service as their main priority.

Not so.

I was planning to visit my daughter in Baltimore for a few days and (against my better judgement) booked a round-trip, business-class ticket with United.

Why United, after the PR nightmare the company has been courting for the last couple months, you may ask?

Well, simply because I fly a lot and had decided early last year to consolidate all my point miles with a single carrier.

Since I already had a lot of United MileagePlus miles, I figured it would not take long for me to reach silver or gold status.

And, as a matter of fact, I did earn gold status, which in theory entitles me to an extra suitcase and access to the company’s exceedingly overcrowded business-class lounges.

In fact, at the end of last year, I was on the verge of reaching platinum status, with 65,032 qualifying miles (you need 75,000 to get platinum).

Not to worry, I figured, by early 2017, I would reach platinum.

But, lo and behold, after I booked my flight and was about to leave, I suddenly checked my status on the United app on my phone, and guess what?

Even though I was told that as long as I flew United at least once every 18 months, my miles and status would not expire, my status was suddenly downgraded to less than silver (which, with 25,000 qualifying miles, constitutes the first tier in the company’s convoluted ranking system) with a measly 3,728 miles.

Annoyed (and convinced that this was simply due to a computer error), I called United and was told to wait on the line for an estimated seven to 10 minutes.

Finally, after nearly 20 minutes, a man who spoke poor English and who seemed to have no knowledge of United’s MileagePlus point program got on the line and after explaining that he could not help me, passed me over to an equally inarticulate woman who supposedly specialized in MileagePlus.

Her 10 minutes of help consisted of informing me that I had 3,728 miles and that it would only take me another 46,272 miles to qualify for gold status.

I pointed out that I had flown United as recently as last January and, at that time, had 65,032 miles, none of which I had redeemed for travel or other expenses.

Her response: “Well, I show here that you flew P class, and I do not know what that is, so I am going to look it up.”

There was a four-minute pause, and then the women came back on the line and informed me that “yes, you traveled P class.”

“That really doesn’t tell me anything,” I responded.

“I know I traveled business class and what I want to know is: Where are my other 61,304 miles?”

She then went off line again for another minute or so and came back and informed me that I had indeed traveled business class, and then had the gall to ask if I had any other questions, graciously reminding me that I was now only 46,272 miles away from re-earning gold status.

At this point I was exasperated and asked to speak to her supervisor who, at least, spoke fluent English.

However, his reply was basically the same as hers, except to note that each year my qualifying points are nullified (despite the promise from United that they would remain valid as long as I flew with the airlines at least every 18 months) and that 3,728 miles I earned on my flight back from Baltimore in early January were a start on regaining my gold status.

This gentleman also pointed out that I was only 46,272 miles away from re-earning gold status.

I insisted that I wanted an explanation, but having been on the phone, paying long-distance fees on my end, for a full 47 minutes, and seeing that the so-called Friendly Skies were, in fact, the We-Don’t-Give-a-Damn-About-Our Customers Skies and the Don’t-Expect-Us-To-Keep-Our-Word Skies, I finally gave up.

I now have a piddly 3,728 miles with United (which will, no doubt, become null and void by year’s end), and have discovered that AeroMéxico has a daily flight between Mexico City and Dulles (the airport I use to get to Baltimore) for about the same price.

And since AreoMéxico has never expropriated my points, nor (to my knowledge) physically assaulted a passenger and dragged them kicking and screaming from a plane in order to give their seat to a company employee (only to add salt to the wound by having the corporation director general defend these actions for 48 hours before finally begrudgingly offering a pseudo apology when images of the attack went viral on the internet), guess which airlines I am going to be flying in the future.

Thérèse Margolis can be reached at therese.margolis@gmail.com.